i would like to stop being zen. i want to make people accountable for their behaviours. i dont want to be taken advantage of or feel like im being taken advantage of even though it might not really be happening. what is reality when you're being nice. everything feels fake. my friend invited me to go grocery shopping and then asked me not to come and instead to join next week because she invited too many people and assumed that i would be okay with this. does this make sense and is it okay to feel annoyed by this type of behaviour? i just want to have people commit to me and not the idea of hanging out with me. i probably did this to other people in the past but never said something like this to their face. i messaged her back saying don't invite me if you're going to un-invite me later. it felt like i stood up for myself, which is probably an overly dramatic way of putting it but hey, i was angry. (righteously?) doesn't matter. there have been other instances where it was clear that i was a second thought. when this happens i would just detach. or get back at them by unfriending them on facebook in high school. how un-zen of me. there is a purpose to this post, and it's to tell whoever's doing this to stop taking advantage of people.