end of the semester

I arrived in Ottawa April 19, a little stressed about taxes and what I'm going to do over the summer. Over time, the stress faded.

Lab

Wheeler lab is full of interesting people. Today I talked to Tanya and she said there may be some work for me to develop an assay testing for a new biomarker ANG2 for the DMF devices. However, Darius came by and said I was not being paid for this but to make devices... When I talked to Chris later he said that they'd appreciate my help and use of my time should be paid for. Tanya is going to e-mail Aaron and run it by him. I also talked to Julian about the reagent testing but halfway through his explanation Alex and Chris came in to tell him I can't be a part of that because it involves skills and more advanced experiments, which could go badly if I messed this up. I'm not sure if Tanya is going to e-mail Aaron either, maybe she'll forget. Thins never happen the way I imagine them to, whether by chance or they were just never meant to be. ?????

Islands in the stream

i am reading the bell jar from nina. it is such an interesting book. I really like how she weaves events together with bits of opinion sprinkled in between.
For ec=xample:

I slid into the self-service elevator and pushed the button for my floor. The doors folded shut like a noiseless accordion. Then my ears went funny, and I noticed a big, smudgy-eyed Chinese woman staring idiotically into my face. It was only me, of course, I was appalled to see how wrinkled and used-up I looked.

Today as I was taking the GO bus from square one I was looking out the window and had some deep thoughts.
My consciousness followed the stream of scenery. I fell into relaxation among the soft afternoon shadows cast by the setting sun. Grass and trees whizzed by, leaving a pastel smudge of scenery as an afterimage behind my eyes as we zoomed towards our destination. When we entered Toronto the green faded to a murkier blue-grey, because the sun was now reflecting off of more and more apartment windows.

I kept thinking about nina's apartment, a place filled with glasses and various food items. I felt sorry we didn't clean up the coconut milk jars. It made me feel more responsible for the mess. Jennifer and I played melee with nina's roomates and they were good, but nina wasn't into it as much.

Last night Jennifer educated both of us on the full story of Narnia. It was very nostalgic.
I need to be careful. If I just read and absorb the books I choose to read like an outsider, I'm not going to get much out of these books. To immerse yourself in literature is to read everything.

this author can inspire through any format, even pdfs

I really sympathize with this paragraph from Eugene Mirabelli's Renato, the Painter. I should buy his book on thursday when I go see Margaret Atwood.

Each time the teacher gave me my report card it surprised and frightened me how low the marks were, because I knew that my mother would read it and hand it back, saying, “You’ll have to give this to your father yourself.” And after my father read it he would shout, “Do you want to be a ditch digger? at’s where you’ll end up, digging ditches! Is that what you want?” at’s where dumb Italians ended up. No, I didn’t want that. Being a ditch digger would mean working beside people like that pig Norman Oldacre who liked to make loud farts and told bathroom jokes and who took me aside in the school yard one morning and beat me up so hard my eyes watered. But I didn’t feel stupid and I knew that the stupidist kid in my class wasn’t me but fat Collins. The teacher told him he was the cow’s tail because he always came in last, but Collins just sat there being fat and smiled and blinked his sleepy-lidded eyes and said nothing. He wasn’t my friend but I thought it was cruel to call him the cow’s tail and make fun of him just because he couldn’t memorize.  

I like how these monologues always have another kid who's being picked on, but the picked-on kid isn't the narrator's friend. I guess it shows that the kid has insight but still, wouldn't it be interesting if they were friends???

I saw pictures of my sister's new bonsai and I felt like crying

Not because I was jealous or anything (appropriate use of smh here), but because the picture had a background with my parents' dining table and the SAME water pitcher from before I left. They didn't even change the location of the plants on the table. I don't think I should look at those pictures any more.

Nina came on Saturday and spent two days here, and she left at 7:30 on the greyhound today. I think it was a really productive weekend seeing as I only applied to starbucks and that was it. BUT I GOT AN INTERVIEW TODAY FROM KEKOU!!!!!

I bought a dress today that is $30 and long and comfy. I lost the spending contest. Final scores were $317 vs $307. I'm going to UO tomorrow to exchange the bag I bought because there's a stain that is not removable by water which is not what the cashier dude said T_T.

There are popping and booming sounds from the fireworks that may be happening down by harbourfront. It feels like summer.

Oh no my tweet to filthy frank was ignored and he did not retweet it :'( I am alone on twitter and possibly in the world. Forever until death.